Normally I try to keep this site pretty focused on exercise and fitness but since I’m not working out right now, I wanted to mention something. Now, I’m having a CT scan tomorrow morning, and in preparation for it I was told that I had to take some Barium. Fine. When I got to the clinic to pick it up (Rx only, you know), I was asked what flavor I wanted. Not having extensive Barium experience I asked the staff for their comments, and was told that berry was “the least nasty.”

Way to sell, guys.

Anyway, I figured that I indeed wanted the “least nasty” experience possible, I’d go for the berry. It wasn’t until I got it home that, after marveling at the quantity of presumably disgusting “berry-um” I’d have to drink, that I noticed the title: “Berry Smoothie”. Now, in my experience a smoothie is a cool, refreshing concoction of frozen fruit and, occasionally, yogurt. Not a 450ml barium sulfate suspension that’s pale white, thin, and smells almost exactly like the worst artificially-flavored berry candy you can imagine from your childhood. What its suspended in will, sadly, remain a mystery since they didn’t see fit to list any other ingredients.

I am so looking forward to dinner tonight.

Oh, and just in case they hadn’t made the product “appealing” enough with its contents, let me draw your attention to the packaging. Yup, down there in the bottom left. You’re not seeing things, that is indeed a colon. Lovely. Actually its the entire digestive system (simplified) but, hey, let’s not quibble over details shall we? I realize that they don’t exactly have to market their product to a choosy audience, but since they’ve gone to some trouble over the label you’d think they’d bother to actually make it appealing. But what do I know, I’m just the consumer.

UPDATE: It actually wasn’t as bad as I was expecting it to be. Don’t get me wrong, its nothing I’d ever choose to drink out of choice, but I’m not dreading my second serving tomorrow morning all that much. Of course, drinking it in one go and having a good strong chaser helped as well.

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